It was not just a bad dream, it really happened: I forgot to wear pants to work. I have a lot on my plate right now and sometimes, something’s gotta give. In this case, I guess it was the pants.
2014 is off to a bad start for us. My husband’s grandmother passed away on the morning of New Year’s Eve. He had to go to the Philippines to be with his family and attend the funeral, so I’m single-mom’ing it for two weeks. We had the polar vortex, snow, freezing rain, ice storm – you name it. It’s literally like hell froze over here in the mid-west. Then, I got a phone call at the elementary school that a Arielle got into their pre-K program. This was actually good news since she was on the waiting list for 6 months, but that meant that I had to make big decisions and add more stuff to my plate.
Oh, and all this while working full-time. I might as well have been blind-folded with one hand tied behind my back to make things interesting.
To sum up, this past week has been – as a dog scratching its butt on a piece of sandpaper would say – RUFF!
So back to the pants thing. On Thursday, I planned on wearing a chevron print tunic and leggings. In my opinion, leggings are legitimate pants as long as the shirt is long enough to cover your booty. I was all set with a cute pair of black booties and leg warmers to keep my ankles nice and toasty. As I was heading out the door I spotted a very visible hole in the leggings and quickly swapped them out for a pair of black tights without thinking twice.
Everything was fine – I actually made it into work and the kids were taken care of. Based on my day-by-day, hour-by-hour approach to this single mom thing, I was surviving. Until I got up from my desk to retrieve a document from the printer and ran into a co-worker… As I was talking to him, I felt oddly exposed. I thought to myself, “Susmariyosep! (that’s Filipino for ‘Jesus, Mary, Joseph!’) Why do I feel like I forgot something today? It feels rather….breezy…down there.” I maintained eye contact through the entire conversation and resisted the urge to look down and draw attention to my – ahem! – situation.
I ran straight to the bathroom and confirmed my greatest fear: I forgot to wear pants. The shirt I was wearing was not long enough to pass as a dress that would be appropriate to wear with just the tights. I mean, it barely covered my lady parts. The good thing is that I remembered to wear the leg warmers as to not freeze my precious ankles. I simply just did not wear pants to work that day.
Leg warmers, yes. Pants, no.
Tights, my friends, are NOT pants. They are typically classified as an undergarment (i.e., underwear or bra). They are flimsier than leggings and sometimes see-through. My leggings were pretty think so it was barely noticeable. But you know that panty-hose part where the support structure texture begins towards the upper thigh? I hope you ladies know what I’m talking about…Well, that awkwardness was exposed because my tunic wasn’t long enough. No bueno.
I spent the better part of the next half hour tucked away in my cube in a crazed fit of hysterical laughter and crying at the same time. I was in the midst of a bona-fide mommy meltdown. Then I tried going into the company store to buy a pair of pants or even a skirt to cover it up. Thank goodness I work in retail, right?! But I did not find any pants that struck my fancy and I decided this:
No pants are better than ugly pants.
My lovely female co-workers assured me that it didn’t look too bad. However, one co-worker stopped me in the hallway to chit-chat and when I mentioned that I forgot to wear pants, she admitted that she was wondering why my dress was so short.
Despite how it looked, I felt exposed. It threw me off for the rest of the day knowing that I forgot something as important and basic as wearing pants. Kinda like a bad dream where you wake up and cannot shake that yucky feeling, except this wasn’t a bad dream and it actually happened to me.
One day, I know, I will be able to look back at this day and laugh. Hahah –
Nope. Too soon.
Have you ever left the house and forgot to put on anything important like your pants? One side of your face without make-up? (Yes, I did that too one time!) The wrong shoes or mis-matched shoes? (Yes, I’ve done that plenty of times!!)
xoxo // gracielle